![]() |
| I heart these women!!! |
![]() |
| Maggie Valley with the girls! |
Of everything, though, the most wonderful part of the weekend was sharing and hearing the struggles of the women I love so much. These are women I met in college when we were nothing more than girls pretending and trying to be women. We've kept in touch through a FB group as well as the traditional phone calls, email, cards, etc. My heart is at rest when I'm with them. It wasn't always so as I often felt unworthy around them...not pretty enough, rich enough, skinny enough. Thankfully, God dispelled those lies before these relationships were lost and I cherish each and every time I get to spend time with them.
This weekend was no different. It did much to soothe and comfort my heart. In the last 5 years, we've had 11 marriages, 2 serve as missionaries, 3 miscarriages, 5 kids, 2 currently pregnant members, infertility problems, and hard core serious marital problems. And it was the sharing of those marital problems that struck me the most. I want to get married, but I'm so afraid I'll choose the wrong guy or that 10 years down the road he doesn't want to be married to me anymore or I/we will have too many issues and he won't want to stay and work through them with me. It scares me to no end. It doesn't help that I feel like marriage is most often portrayed as the cure all for life's problems or it's touted as an institution that is horribly bad and needs to be avoided at all costs. I don't agree with either of those views and although I've seen many good examples of marriage, it still scares the crap out of me.
So as I sat and cried with these sisters of my heart, I was struck by their strength, tenacity, and faith in Christ. Even as one shared that her husband confessed to lying for 3 1/2 out of the 4 years of their marriage, she never sought a way out of the marriage. As another said her husband continually falls into the sin of a particular temptation, she doesn't degrade or belittle him, she prays for him. Another, knowing the grip a certain sin and the ensuing struggle it causes in the life of her fiance, happily plans their uncoming wedding. Still another shares the anger, hurt, and frustration of infertility yet she'd have it no other way than with the man who hurts and comforts her better than any other person alive.
In these women I see what marriage really looks like. It's not all butterflies and picnics, but it's beautiful all the same. I hate that they are going through these struggles, but I feel so honored that they are allowing me to walk this journey with them. Of all the weddings I've been invited to, apart of, or just sent gifts, none have allowed me to glimpse what real marriage looks like. It's as scary as I thought it would be, but these women just did more to convince me it's worth the scariness than anyone else has ever done. I hope if I'm ever married I can be an encouragement and share life with someone just as they have with me.


i feel the exact same about marriage-scares the crap out of me. thanks for posting this. i'm so glad you have such encouraging and honest married friends!
ReplyDelete