I have none of those.
And it sometimes gets me down. It's easy, especially living in a Christian and Southern culture, to feel bad about yourself if you didn't make the "right" decisions and become a 22 year old Christian Leadership graduate who stepped off the graduation podium directly into the church for a wedding that, within a year, is followed by the birth of the first of numerous children who are all given Biblical names. If you're like me, an unexpectedly single woman (unexpected because like every girl I just knew I'd find my love in college :P) quickly approaching 30, you've either let yourself go, aren't trying hard enough, are focusing too much on work or ought to give the the idea of marriage and family and devote the rest of your life to being a missionary (all misguided and unwarranted suggestions of why I'm single. And all very FALSE).
But I refuse to accept that. First, because it's just not true. Condoleezza Rice is single and look at all that she's accomplished. Second, I know too many wonderful women who aren't married for this to be true. Statistically we all couldn't have let ourselves go, only be focusing on careers, not trying hard enough, or ought to be missionaries. This isn't to say some of these things aren't true. I know I eat more ice cream than any almost 30 year old woman should. But that's why I'm not married? Child please. Third, though I'll never be a Condie Rice or an Oprah Winfrey or a Marissa Mayer, that's not my purpose in life and I'm okay with that! Crowds won't ever chant my name, mimic my style, or seek my approval. But I don't care. Because I don't need the accolades. I don't need the notoriety. Yeah, I'd like to be someone's wife and a couple of little someones mom, but right now I'm called to be three little ones Tia (aunt in Spanish). And I LOVE it! Seriously, tell me this isn't the best advertisement of mutual and complete adoration, love, and fun!?! My camera has tons of these photos in which we come up with random scenarios, react, and snap a photo. As you'll see in the description, my nephew loves reptiles.
Top L: we were afraid of snakes R: my beautiful nieces Bottom L: my handsome little man R: running from dinosaurs |
I don't care if I never make a million dollars or leave this world having made a global difference. I've made a difference in three lives. And those three lives are worth more to me that a million of Beyonce's records. My mom told me recently that the girls were playing dress up and my 2 yr old niece said she was me. I cried, which I do a lot. Baby Girl looks up to me. No, she's not had a lot of outside exposure in her short little life, but she knows love. She knows she's cared for and wanted and adored. And that is one of the most important things I can give to her, her sister, and her brother.
So to my fellow singles (male and female), stand up and be proud! We aren't any less valuable or important or wanted because we currently aren't wives/husbands or moms/dads. We're daughters/sons and sisters/brothers and aunts/uncles and friends and co-workers and workout buddies. We're setting examples and changing lives every day exactly where we are and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise.
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity. I Timothy 4:12